A Case Of Writer’s Block And A Lesson Learned.

The Struggle Is So Real!
Photo Credit: snaadtmedia.com

I officially launched iBeBlogging 7 days ago, yet I already have a horrific case of writer’s block. Further compounding the problem is that I’m unable to create any melodic flow to my words. Sadly, my best sentence was my first – literally everything from there has been a shit-show of edits, backspaces and cuts! My thoughts (which are steadily on the rise and worsening by the second), are: 1. I’m not good enough 2. Will this be the last article that I write? 3. Creating this blog was a huge mistake. 4. I’m a total failure and 4.5 A very big one too! 

For context, it has taken me a total of 90 embarrassing minutes to write the above and thus, a “projected” 90 plus more minutes, just to finish. I am literally struggling with what I’m naturally gifted at? This is completely insane and scares me immensely! The fear, self-judgment and self-hate that I’m feeling in this moment, are as real as the night is long. 

But, there is a silver lining here thankfully. You see, during my bout of writer’s block, I came across an article detailing an incredibly lucrative side-hustle that not only did I think was perfectly suited for a friend, but a gig that I knew they would need for their soul. While agonizing through a tangible torture of self-fueled-failures, I willingly provided someone with a fail-proof solution to their own struggles and also made certain to list several indisputable, confidence-building reasons as to why they would succeed.

Whenever I’m in pursuit of making someone see themselves as beautifully as they are seen, my process is relentless and unyielding. I don’t “blow smoke” up the crack of anyone’s ass – instead, I light a fire that is volcanic hot and sun-kissed bright! When I’m done, not only will you believe that you can do it (and why), but that you must!

I’m not going to lie. The structure and style of this article sucks – that’s where I’ve failed today. However, a friend is now better positioned, feeling confident and are in pursuit of their “why” in life – that’s where I’ve succeeded. As I write this article, what’s unfolding here is that my “terrible” habit of hating on myself while loving on others, is actually a selfless gift, albeit a difficult one. The great sacrifice is that although I am feeling down, someone else is feeling up, having been leveraged by me.

This new understanding of my gift gives me balance and peace while placing things back into perspective – it also makes me feel pretty good about myself too. The lesson that I’ve been fortunate enough to learn today, and can now teach is simply that if one of your “engines” fails (in my case, writing), it’s perfectly okay to depend on the other (my selflessness), to help with a safe landing…

SIDE NOTE: It took me 3 hours to write this mess of an article but the lesson learned, is timeless..

Thank You For Taking A Moment To “Dance” With Me