Sometimes Bad Things Happen, So That Worse Things Don’t.

Photo Credit: Fé Ngô

When I finally birthed my baby, I had no idea that there would be complications. I expected a vibrant and healthy bundle of joy; one to be loved and received by all. I learned quickly, however, that this would not be the case. You see, the “baby” that I birthed was my Blog, and the “complications,” were some of the unexpected reactions that I received. 

Placed strategically on the inside of my front door, is a handwritten note that reads “You must learn to champion and cheerlead yourself with the same level of excitement and voracity that you cheerlead others.” I created this quote some years ago, in an attempt to force myself into a healthier relationship with me. I wanted to begin loving on me, the way that I effortlessly love on everyone BUT me… In reading this quote, one could easily imagine how very supportive I am of people; one can understand too, just how devastated I’d become if the same level of support isn’t matched. 

To further expand on how supportive I am, whenever someone introduces me to their “baby,” I legitimately need to be shot with a Tranquilizer Dart (or two), just to calm myself down! I sometimes cry from joy, I ALWAYS clap with excitement and then immediately start asking questions ranging from “What inspires you,” to “How did you develop the courage to finally do it” and “How do you feel in this moment?” Next are endless congratulations, several I’m so proud of yous and lastly, how can I help? 

And then it happened – my time had finally come… After launching, I vulnerably stood on stage hoping for a standing ovation of support, yet one person in the crowd remained seated during the surrounding eruption of applause. Their response to my “firstborn,” was as mundane and as monotone as you might imagine a lecture on the history of bricks would be! Honestly, the shit devastated me – I simply wasn’t prepared for such lack and admit that I’m still struggling through the shock, process and pain of it all.

I’ve come to learn, however, that if there’s something to go through, then there’s something to grow through as well. During those questionable times when the people closest to you disappoint you past your desire to forgive, it might serve us best, if we practice gratitude in our moment of despair. Oftentimes, when things appear to be falling apart, they’re actually coming together for our benefit which is something we can learn to be grateful for.

The reality is that when we’re going places and are reaching higher levels in our lives, some just aren’t meant to be apart of that process, nor share in the final result, so these disappointments can actually serve as helpful indicators that are calling for change – a change that we might not have made without the introduction of a hurtful catalyst.

So, a bad thing happens and it possibly kills what was, but… What if what was to come, would have been worse? What if the hurtful thing that someone has done, was just the beginning of the bad things that they intended to do? In these trying moments, it can be helpful to embrace the notion that sometimes bad things do happen, just so that worse things don’t…  

Thank You For Taking A Moment To “Dance” With Me